Five Minute Friday: Commit

This post is part of the weekly Five Minute Friday series. Five minutes of free-flow writing shared with whoever wants to read it. This week’s prompt is: COMMIT.

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Again, this post is a week late.  As I put off writing about ACHIEVE last week, I fell behind this week.  Fitting that I am behind on the topic of COMMIT.  Like I talked about in the Achieve post I have a hard time committing to things that I might not be good at.  I like to be the best, shocking, in everything I do. Am I?  Absolutely not.  Honestly, pretty much never.  So I sit out when I probably should get involved.  However, there is one time in my life that I did the complete opposite of my natural tendency.  I decided to shoot my shot, no matter how hard it seemed because I felt like if I committed to it and tried hard enough, I could make it happen.

Case in Point: College.

Going into senior year, I knew a few things.

- I wanted to make a difference in the world.  

- I loved all things medical.

- I wanted to tell kids about Jesus.

Push all of those things together, and I decided my (and God's plan) was for me to go to Medical School and become a doctor, nay, pediatrician on the mission field. 

For me, this epitomized "the best".  It looked pretty, sounded Holy, and would prove I was smart.  Fast forward four years and shocker upon shocker, I didn't get accepted into medical school.  Talk about a shot to my pride.  Something I spent YEARS trying for didn't pan out.  And not in a, "oh we can try again" way.  But in a "the scales fell off my eyes, I finally saw the error of my ways and clearly this was never gonna happen for me" way. 

Is it funny to think about now?  Kinda,  Though it still stings 15 years later.

Did I learn a lot from the experience?  Definitely.  I could write for DAYS about what I got out of this experience, but 5 mins isn't going to cut it.

My main take home: Go big or go home doesn't always pan out.

And that's ok.  I have a beautiful life.  I have a wonderful family and a ministry I adore.  I can't even imagine what my life would have looked like had I spend more time, money, and strain to achieve a goal I had no place committing to in the first place.  

Praise the Lord that His ways are higher than ours, even when a dream seems to end. 

STOP.