Five Minute Friday: PEACE

 This post is part of the weekly Five Minute Friday series. Five minutes* of free-flow writing shared with whoever wants to read it. This week’s prompt is: PEACE.

*this one took more than 5 minutes, but I needed to process the incident.

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After a fun evening at the arcade for a birthday party, the big kids and I were in a car accident on Friday. I’ve never been in one before. 

As we were coming to a stop at a red light, the car behind me did not. Apparently, the car behind them didn’t get the memo we were stopping, rammed their car, who in turn hit me, and cause me to graze the lady in front of me. My car is totaled, but we are all ok!

As I was on the phone with 911, my 5 and 9 year olds were in tears, terrified. I keep telling them to breath big deep breaths and we were all ok. Once the police showed up, we drove to an empty parking lot, out of the middle of the road. While we were driving over, we prayed and thanked the Lord for His protection for us and listed all of the specific things we were thankful to Him for. Peace began to come over all of us. However, when I needed to get out of the car to talk with the police, the anxiety came back. I told the kids they could get out of their car seats and sit with each other in the front if it would help. They cuddled together and I got out. 

Knowing I hadn’t told Jeff what was happening I asked the policeman for a minute to call him. It’s never an easy call to make, or receive.

“Babe, we are all ok, but we’ve been in an accident. I need you to talk to the kids while I talk to the police. They are ok, just freaked out and I don’t want them to be alone while I’m out here”. 

I saw their faces instantly melt when they heard his voice. Before I knew it he had called a neighbor to watch the babies and was in the car to rescue us, all the while talking to the big kids. I’ll never forget the calm inside the car when I got back in. All because we were able to hear daddy’s voice and knew he was on his way.

How often has that been me? Scared and alone, just needing to hear from the Father and know He was near. Even cuddled up close to another for comfort, not realizing what would truly make it better. He is always there, just waiting for us to make the call.

I am thankful for Jeff, everyday. He is such an amazing husband and father. He works so hard to take care of all 6 of us. He goes to bed exhausted each night because he has spent every last bit of himself for us. 

What a gift to have a living representation of Christ in our home! 

STOP.

Five Minute Friday: STRETCH

This post is part of the weekly Five Minute Friday series. Five minutes of free-flow writing shared with whoever wants to read it. This week’s prompt is: STRETCH.

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So, I have been behind the past few weeks, but I have finally caught up!  It would have been easy for me to just skip those weeks and just start this one.  However, I have set a goal to write each week's topic, so I wrote three in the past two days.  

That might not seem like a big deal to anyone else, but it's a HUGE stretch for me.  As I wrote in the last two, I HATE to do things half way.  It's either go big or stay home.  No pressure, but if you've got a few minutes, check out the last two entries: Achieve and Commit.

But for this post, I will just say that I have been stretched beyond recognition these past two years of the pandemic.  I barely recognize myself.  I have been more isolated, and lonely than I thought possible. And that is saying something as I'm surrounded by a husband and four kids.  It's a new kind of lonely though.  One where the rest of the world seems to have gone on but I just feel kind of stuck.  And it's not in a bad or good way, it's just an observation.

Because I was in a high risk category when I was pregnant with the twins, we had to pull back more than we would have at the start of the pandemic.  Then, when they came so early, we had to pull back even more.  When the babies finally got to come home we had to do everything we could to make sure they didn't end up back in the hospital, so we basically never left the house.

BUT!  We had a doctor's appointment today and she has cleared us to be around more people!  Not going crazy, or being in large crowds, but we get to go back to church!  I am so happy, but also a little nervous.  I'm out of practice of being around people... I have to wear real clothes and shower.  This is new territory for me!  I have to get 6 people out the door, dresssed, clean, fed and in the car to get to the church on time.

Our Virtual Sundays, with Jude out of view.

What a crazy world we live in.  Two years ago, if you had told me I would be nervous to leave my house, I would have thought YOU were crazy.  But now, I'm not so sure.

STOP.

Five Minute Friday: Commit

This post is part of the weekly Five Minute Friday series. Five minutes of free-flow writing shared with whoever wants to read it. This week’s prompt is: COMMIT.

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Again, this post is a week late.  As I put off writing about ACHIEVE last week, I fell behind this week.  Fitting that I am behind on the topic of COMMIT.  Like I talked about in the Achieve post I have a hard time committing to things that I might not be good at.  I like to be the best, shocking, in everything I do. Am I?  Absolutely not.  Honestly, pretty much never.  So I sit out when I probably should get involved.  However, there is one time in my life that I did the complete opposite of my natural tendency.  I decided to shoot my shot, no matter how hard it seemed because I felt like if I committed to it and tried hard enough, I could make it happen.

Case in Point: College.

Going into senior year, I knew a few things.

- I wanted to make a difference in the world.  

- I loved all things medical.

- I wanted to tell kids about Jesus.

Push all of those things together, and I decided my (and God's plan) was for me to go to Medical School and become a doctor, nay, pediatrician on the mission field. 

For me, this epitomized "the best".  It looked pretty, sounded Holy, and would prove I was smart.  Fast forward four years and shocker upon shocker, I didn't get accepted into medical school.  Talk about a shot to my pride.  Something I spent YEARS trying for didn't pan out.  And not in a, "oh we can try again" way.  But in a "the scales fell off my eyes, I finally saw the error of my ways and clearly this was never gonna happen for me" way. 

Is it funny to think about now?  Kinda,  Though it still stings 15 years later.

Did I learn a lot from the experience?  Definitely.  I could write for DAYS about what I got out of this experience, but 5 mins isn't going to cut it.

My main take home: Go big or go home doesn't always pan out.

And that's ok.  I have a beautiful life.  I have a wonderful family and a ministry I adore.  I can't even imagine what my life would have looked like had I spend more time, money, and strain to achieve a goal I had no place committing to in the first place.  

Praise the Lord that His ways are higher than ours, even when a dream seems to end. 

STOP.

Five Minute Friday: ACHIEVE

This post is part of the weekly Five Minute Friday series. Five minutes of free-flow writing shared with whoever wants to read it. This week’s prompt is: ACHIEVE.

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I'll be honest.  I'm writing this post two weeks late.  Not because I haven't had the time.  It's just that I haven't had the words.  But in the quest to actually stick to writing, I'll try.

I think my hesitation has come because "Achieve" is kind of a hot topic button for me.  Full disclosure- if I don't go into a challenge at least 90% sure I can complete it and do it well, I probably won't even try.  

Tryouts, auditions, or anything else that has a critique of any kind... that's a HARD PASS.

It's been like that forever.  While I am driven and as hard headed as they come, failure stops me dead in my tracks.  Because if I don't achieve my goal, everyone will know, and will see that I am not good enough. 

I'm assuming most people struggle with this, right?  Each of us have this lie inside, that was deeply planted thousands of years ago in the garden.  The lie that says everyone is against us, when all we truly want is to be fully seen and loved.

So, although it's something I have to actively work on, I am thankful that the battle has already been won.  The enemy has been defeated. The lie has been uncovered and washed away.  I just have to believe it. 

STOP.

The Terrible Lie:
Jesus Storybook Bible